I Shit Music

Nothing like a bit of unlikely inspiration to get you out of your Monday funk. If you’re on top of your viral music clips, then I’m sure you’re already aware of the legendary Iron Mic Battle between Eli Porter and Envy. The school day rap battle filmed for an Atlanta high-school blew up 5 years ago with the completely absurd lines that Eli threw down. The kid obviously has some sort of mild retardation, but the earnest nature of which he attempts to actually free-style is a modern example of how simple moments can affect the lives of millions these days – at present the rap battle has over 4 million hits. Here’s the clip:

At first glance, the whole thing is completely hilarious. The awkward pause after Eli’s line “I did it” has become a thing of legend, let alone the infamous line – “I’m like Rosie O’Donnell at a bi-sexual bridal shower.” However, the further you analyze the whole situation, the more Eli stands out as a creature expanding through a forever recorded moment of human divinity. Seriously, these are the moments that make you realize the unlimited possibilities of experience in our modern age. I love the fucking kid, and thank God somebody else did enough to make a 30-minute, top-quality produced movie about the whole scene. It’s pretty much genius. First it brings a sly grin to your face, then it makes you die laughing, then it makes you pause and say, “Goddamn 2012 is a good time to be alive.” And once again, white nerds seem to have the most insightful things to say about the inner workings of the hip-hop world.

Back on it! Ok, so a lot has happened in my month hiatus from the blogosphere, and as much as I’m ready to rant and rave about a holographic Tupac, I’m actually much more excited about David Lynch starting to make his own music videos. The genius, absurdist director has always had an odd toe curled into the music world, but his most profound leap surely came with his involvement in the 2010 Danger Mouse & Sparklehorse album - Dark Night of the Soul. Not only is the album artwork a profound echo of the morbid beauty within the music, but he also provides vocals to two of the album’s epic tracks. Here’s my favorite: “Star Eyes (I Can’t Catch It)”

And yeah that’s right – I said album artwork – this is a key album to hold in at least some sort of true physical release. Anyway, after the delicate lofts of that tune, we now turn to the complete heart-quivering insanity of his newest work: “Crazy Clown Time.” This new 7 minute video is basically like someone said: Hey Dave, I’m really on the fly right now, but was wondering if you could impart all the confused despair of subjected reality upon me that your feature films do while I make a cup of coffee? I doubt anyone would really have the desire to put this track on their iPod – well, maybe for a Halloween party or something. That’s not true either, there’s always somebody who just loves listening to the craziest shit ever. But the main thing is that the video is a direct link to the song – the lyrics are a literal description of what’s happening in the video, which is totally the most demented back-yard party of all time. Just give it a go – if you’re a Lynch fan, then it will be just what you expected – if you like roller coasters and haunted houses than it will be a blast the first time around – the rest of you may have a hard time getting past the screaming guy with his head on fire.